Trad Wife – Lyrics
She’s on the gram
And in the mags
Follow her course
And buy her swag
She tweets away
Pro-life hashtags
She don’t mind
Online attacks
She sends DM’s
Creates content
Misogyny
It makes her laugh
Roe v. Wade
Is such a drag
Love only hurts
When she nags
Asks permission
From her better half
Ooh!
Trying to be the perfect trad-wife
Looking for a daddy with a mid-life
Shrinking her dreams just to survive
Rumours of her past are so rife
Four kids and a queen bee in a mad hive
She cooks dinner
Cleaning’s her task
Handmade soaps
Her humble brag
Male breadwinner
Wears what he asks
His house and rules
She loves to beg
She can’t do zigs
Can only zag
Full submission
More red flags
Hides ambition
Husband checks
Knows how to please
She never gags
Ooh!
Trying to be the perfect trad-wife
Looking for a daddy with a mid-life
Shrinking her dreams just to survive
Rumours of her past are so rife
Four kids and a queen bee in a mad hive
To the kitchen
Overly attached
Wholesome cooking
It’s all from scratch
The corn and beets
From a veggie patch
Soup and juices
Made in a batch
Full motherhood
That’s her pledge
Andrew thinks she’s
Quite the catch
Wife and mother
Without a hedge
Nineteen fifties
Vibe to match
Ooh!
Trying to be the perfect trad-wife
Looking for a daddy with a mid-life
Shrinking her dreams just to survive
Rumours of her past are so rife
Four kids and a queen bee in a mad hive
Inspo from
Handmaid’s tale
She’s three fifths
Just female
Doesn’t protest
A new bill
Has no interest
In a pill
Patriarchy
Will it prevail?
All her rights
Are now on sale
Second sex
She’s so frail
See what’s next
Let’s try the veil
Ooh…
Let’s try the veil
Ooh…
Let’s not try the veil…
